BIG S....

Funny thing is, parang hanggang ngayon hindi mo pa rin alam why i did those things.
It was for your attention. Na somehow you’ll get to see the things you’re doing that hurt me.
Pero the more na ginagawa ko yun, the more na lumalayo ka.
I felt, you forgot to somehow appreciate me for being there because of them.
Yeah right, its the FEELING [the I LIKE U THING]!
And the more i ask for a little consideration, the more na nakikita kita with them.
It’s like, you are being biased. Inconsiderate.

But i was too. It took me a while to realized that.

Things were messed up. Naiisip ko lagi, if i started to disregard you, i will be able to forget you and pretend that you don’t exist. Pero yun nga, the more that i try, the more it hurts.
I thought by saying harsh words will make things easier.
Pero yun, mabigat pala sa loob, because i am destroying a friendship.

Ganun pala yun, hirap talaga pag una, trial and error.
And malamang, hindi mo nakikita yung struggle ko because you are too focused to yourself.

Then after the last battle, someone made me realized na mali ako, [hard core. Fine!]
That i was reacting too much. Too much in a sense that i was demanding too much.
That it could have been better if i discussed it with you.
But how, kung ayaw mo ng ganun?
Ang hirap pag dedma yung kabilang side tapos yung kabila naman sensitive.
Parang humihingi ka ng candy pero pilit ibinibigay sayo ay asin.

Was i just paranoid? Or you are really giving me the reason to push myself away?

Then came the text na hindi ka na galit sakin [WTF! At ikaw pa ang galit saken? Da hell]
But then, if i will not reconcile and eat my pride, lalo nang walang mangyayari.
Afterall, im older, a bit mature [at times], and started the commotion...
To tell you frankly, i wasn’t at ease. Nakakapaso.
Siguro kasi, its not the right time.

But things went well.

Except that, i still believe i deserve a BIG S....
Don’t you think?
For all that had happen.
It will mean a lot...
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What if sabihin kong, im not yet over you?
E di nawindang ka na naman noh?
Sabihin nalang nating wala na dun sa punto na gaya ng dati.
I am able now to joke things with you about stuff na medyo awkward dati.
I am more comfortable now of the touch, green jokes, and stuff.
Simply put, wala nang malisya or what, i hope you feel the same.
I saw the traits the turned me off [naks] and realized you are better off as a friend [yabang].
That exerting much effort would be such a waste.

You are not worth it on that aspect and that i am too immature for such...

Such things can wait.
_________________________________


Tao lang ako, i will keep on making mistakes. Will tend to do immature things.
And yup, you have to deal with my dramas. Yun ako eh.
The problem is, you are the exact opposite of me.
CLASH!

I guess communication is the key...
I hope from now on we can talk things over.
Kahit pajoke lang, ang importante we know the things na nangyayari.
But i will not dwell on things na wala naman ako Kebs.
Unless, nadradrag ako [syempre!]

________________________________

There are times that you need to speak up.
Just to straight things up.
SILENCE sometimes can be equated to COWARDNESS.


________________________________

Hindi porke lalaki ka, kailangan lagi kang mataas.
Hindi basehan yun ng pagiging lalaki.
Ang pagpapakumbaba ay katumbas ng pagrespeto sa kapwa.


_______________________________

As always,

SALAMAT...